Rant.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
You're always not here when i need you the most. Forever busy partying somewhere.
Like tonight, for instance, you're off at that bitch's chalet.
Did you even stop for one second to think about me? You don't allow me to go out with my friends or for my class chalet. You restrict every single thing for me. But when you wanna do those things, it's okay?
Tell me, Matthew, how is that fair?
All i'm asking is for you to be here for me. To tell me everything's gonna be alright. And to not give me shit all the time. Cause i've really had enough of this. I've had enough of being treated like shit. Enough of your lifestyle. Enough of your attitude.
It's really pissing me off.
If you don't care about this relationship at all, tell me now. Tell me and then fuck off. I don't want to see you ever again. Don't bother seeing me, texting me, or calling me.
I have enough of my own shit to deal with. I don't want to deal with yours too. Seriously, make up your mind.
You're already gonna be 21 this year. Time for you to step up and take responsibility. You know, last time you promised you'd always spend Fri, Sat and Sun with me. But so far, you've failed.
There was this one Sat you said promised you'd go for your friend's POP. So i said fine, and we didn't meet. You said that'd be the last time. And then...another Sat, it was your friend's b'day party at a chalet. Again, you promised it'd be the last time. So fine, i was okay with it. And then last Sat...again, you had to go for a friend's farewell party . You promised last Sat would be the last. Somehow, i don't believe that. Somewhere over the next few weeks, or months, more Sats will come where you'll def come up with excuses and say we can't meet.
I've come to a stage where i can't expect much out of you. It's like you'd rather spend time with your friends than with me. I get it, i'm boring. That fricking hurts though. I know i'm not important to you at all. Bros before hoes huh?
You spend more time with your friends on their birthdays then with me on mine. Like last year, my 18th b'day. Yeah we went to the zoo and all but you fricking left at 6pm cause you claimed you had a headache. Then you said you were sick and all that crap. It was supposed to be my birthday and you managed to turn it around and make it about yourself. And you know what i did that night? I just spent my birthday alone in my room, watching shows on my laptop and moping. Other people would be out celebrating but no, not me. My birthday was ruined...
And somehow, i don't expect much out of you for my birthday this year. I don't expect anything from anyone. I'm probably just gonna spend it alone like i normally do.
You're already entering NS in exactly 2 weeks time. We were supposed to be spending as much time together as we could. Is that happening? I'm sure you can answer that question yourself. Me, coming over, watching you sleep...that is not what i call spending time together AT ALL. Me watching you play dota is not spending time together either. Spending time together is when you do things together. It's like you don't enjoy spending time with me.
We've even run out of things to say to each other. Like at our V'day dinner. You kept fidgeting, checking your phone, going out to smoke, calling your friends on the hp. Then when your friend came to the restaurant, you went to his table to talk to him and just left me alone. I thought i was supposed to be your date, No?
So seriously, what do you even need me for? You afraid of being alone? Cause it seems to me you won't ever be alone. You have all your dear dear friends whom you seem to love more than you love me.
So yeah, wtv, you can choose to take this seriously or treat it as a joke. The choice is entirely up to you. Whatever it is, i hope it's the right choice for you, me and this thing we call a relationship.
Make a decision before it's too late and i decide for you.
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