Hurt.
Sunday, August 26, 2012
You've hurt me so many times. Always mentally. You lie constantly to me. You expect so much out of me when you don't even practice what you preach. Sure, you've hit me and pushed me before but it was due to us playing or retaliation from when I beat you. But never did I expect you to slap me like how you did today. You slapped me so hard, my ears started ringing and I couldn't see for a split second. My cheeks burned so badly and I was in so much pain. I was in shock for a moment and then the uncontrollable crying started. It was so bad, I even started shivering from the pain.
From that moment on, I couldn't look at you in the eye. Even look at your face. You fill me with disgust. This relationship has taken a super big turn for the worst. It has turned into an abusive relationship and I need to get out before it's too late
You tried to make me feel better and show me how sorry you were for hitting me but honestly, it was too late. You are nothing but scum in my eyes. You kept saying sorry over and over and I kept saying "Nvm, it's not your fault. I deserved it."
From that moment on, I couldn't look at you in the eye. Even look at your face. You fill me with disgust. This relationship has taken a super big turn for the worst. It has turned into an abusive relationship and I need to get out before it's too late
You tried to make me feel better and show me how sorry you were for hitting me but honestly, it was too late. You are nothing but scum in my eyes. You kept saying sorry over and over and I kept saying "Nvm, it's not your fault. I deserved it."
Of course, I lied when I was saying that. How the hell do I deserve such treatment. Such horrible treatment from the one person who is supposed to protect me from any harm and who is supposed to treat me like I'm the only girl in his life.
This relationship sucks so bad, there's probably no way to salvage it anymore. I've dragged this on for far too long. I want out. No way am I going to remain with someone who doesn't treat me as their first choice. With you it's always bros before hoes.
Take tonight for example, you promised you'd text me constantly. And yes, it's been 3 hrs and no sign from you. Called your phone and you didn't bother to pick up. Maybe you're dead? I wouldn't know.
Honestly, I don't think I mean a thing to you at all. And I find myself slowly drifting away from you and out of love with you. I don't even remember what made me fall in love with you in the first place. You're nothing but a monster to me now.
This needs to end before I get even more hurt.
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